Expectation

Expectation is no joke… at a restaurant, we expect food to come out of the kitchen hot, we expect traffic to be light around evening time, we expect that with all the preparation and organization that we have been doing, that everything will turn out fine. We expect things and we expect they will be alright. But what if all our expectations didn’t pan out. The server sets down a plate of cold fries, it took three hours to get home because of a fallen crane on the freeway, we fail the preliminary exam after months of studying to get into the program of our dreams.

In a perfect world, perhaps all our expectations are possible. We expect basic common decency from our colleagues, but this sometimes doesn’t happen; the more we try to steer our actions to help out the outcome of our expectations, it seems the more we suffer because either our actions have gone against our intuition or it is out of principle. We expect people to be nice at best, but what if being nice is the hardest thing for them to do. What if they are spiritually-depleted, can we still expect them to extend that basic common decency towards us when they are hanging on their dear life scrambling for that last drop of light to fuel their spirit?

This was an epiphany I had today, during a conversation about why it is we get so frustrated about people who rule with ego, who manages with fear and intimidation, who seems to pick on people who carry a light about them. That word spiritually-depleted opened me to this understanding: people without light will naturally try to take it from those who carry in themselves a great amount of it. Because they don’t know how to build light in themselves, they will try to hijack it. But no worries, if one has kindness in their hearts and willingness to share this kindness with the people around them, one will never have to worry about light depletion. Light only gets stronger when we impart it to the world.

what of my light that attracts,
I am a junebug in December, I
light up the night, patrol the
universe and shield it with smiles;
my love of you I didn’t recognize,
but look into my eyes and take
what ray from my gaze/ oh
never mind your lack of courteous
inquiry: what light you take can
only strengthen the filaments within

-mr gahon 7/28/14

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